[00:00:18] Speaker A: Welcome to Friendly Competition, a podcast to discover the best of all time. I'm Nick Carey, alongside my co host and best friend, Cody Lena. We discuss various pop culture topics and narrow it down to truly the best of all time.
[00:00:31] Speaker B: Or as we like to call it, the boat. Before he gets the foot on the boat, we put him into a sweet 16 style tournament. We argue each round till we decide a winner. Nick, what cartoon do we use? We decide. He steps foot on the boat.
[00:00:40] Speaker A: Whatever the hell we want. Cody, you want to tell him what we're talking about this season?
[00:00:43] Speaker B: Absolutely. My hunger's finally been sated. Nick finally left me out of my basement, let me rummage around, get my snoot and some baked goods. Got my snoot and some food. Lots of eggs were involved, but I finally got to fill my belly. And we did our breakfast research.
[00:00:57] Speaker A: That is correct. And here we are, folks, in the final four, which means if you haven't listened to them yet, go back, listen to group A, B, C, and D to see how we got here. But here in the final four, we have the group a champion cereal going up against the group B champion breakfast burritos. And then on the other side of the bracket, we have the Group C champion omelets going up against the group D champion french toast. Cody, where do you want to start? I just.
[00:01:26] Speaker B: I want to acknowledge the fact that if you look at this final four, if you. If you take away all the everything else and cover it up and look at the palm for. This is pretty good. This is for breakfast. Things that make sense and belong in the final four talk. This breakfast was a murderer's row. You need to go back and listen to the old everything stood a chance to get into this final four.
[00:01:44] Speaker A: It turns out breakfast is awesome. And, like, rule. It's one of those things, too, where it's like, you'll do this, like, maybe once a month, maybe once every other month, where you're like, you'll. You'll look at your partner, your roommates, whomever, and just be like, guys want to do breakfast for dinner. And every single person acts like it's the first time they've heard this idea, and they're like, fuck, yes. That's exactly. Oh, my God. That may be the greatest single idea that I've ever heard, and it just makes me believe, like, dog eggs. What are we messing around with all of these other food groups? Why do we even.
[00:02:22] Speaker B: Why do we even have dinner? Why is dinner.
[00:02:25] Speaker A: Skip it. Why do pot roast? Why do we have to make pot roast. Get it out of here and make an omelet, I promise you, quicker. And you can. Do you know what you can't put in an omelet? Nothing. Everything goes into an omelet. Shout out, cherry street grilled and vermillion, South Dakota. Hundred and two different types of omelet. What's 102nd one, you ask? Whatever they have in the kitchen at the time, they'll just put it in there.
[00:02:51] Speaker B: They wild. I'm just surprised that place went out of business.
[00:02:56] Speaker A: Well, because sometimes they would put, you know, like, they, they'd be like, oh, you know what? All right. Your special, your special chef's omelet. Here's what I did for you. I got, we had some salmon cooked up real nice, so I'm putting that in there. I'm going to put a little. I'm going to put a little raspberry jalapeno compote that I just made fresh right now for you. And I'm going to. I'm just going to put the tiniest bit of mint. Just a little bit. But it's going to pop and set this thing off right? And you're like, oh, that's so. Okay. That's creative. Other times they're like, uh, I got.
[00:03:30] Speaker B: I just farted on it. I farted on your omelette. It's like, what?
[00:03:33] Speaker A: What? Yeah, they're just, like, mixing. They're just looking around the kitchen, like, uh, uh, uh, we, we, uh, we put it, uh, we put ribs in there. Oh, cool. I like rib meat. No, just the bones. Just. Yeah, rib bones. Actually, it's mostly bones. Um. Dude, I didn't know what to do.
[00:03:50] Speaker B: I love breakfast. For dinner, I'm right there with you. But if somebody. Can you imagine in your heart of hearts eating an over easy egg at dinner time. Dog. That's when I think breakfast for dinner. I don't do that. French toast is fine. Omelets are fine. Fuck, I'd even do a quiche. But if you give me a runny assay, it's too late for this. I don't know why it's too late for this, but it is. I didn't make the laws. You're going straight to jail.
[00:04:10] Speaker A: To be clear, you're. It's mostly runny eggs. Is that. Is that where you, like, you just can't. You can't see it? What about. Because there are people who will put that just on a burger. It's not a breakfast burger. It's just a burger.
[00:04:21] Speaker B: Kimmy started on that. I don't put runny eggs on sandwiches.
[00:04:26] Speaker A: Why is it I wanted. Hey, if I wanted a gusher, I would have bought them. Okay, exactly how if.
[00:04:32] Speaker B: Oh, my God. And the worst is when you get a burger, right, with a fried egg on it, and you take up. You lift it up to take a bite, and then you bite and realize that, oh, they made this bitch over easy.
[00:04:40] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:04:40] Speaker B: There's so many ways to cook an egg that doesn't do this.
[00:04:43] Speaker A: You know why we haven't made savory gushers? You don't think that General Mills didn't get in there, like, they made fruit gushers and, like, this is crushing it. What if we do savory gushers? They've probably, I guarantee you they spent north of $50 million in R and D just being like, we're going to get this. Like, maybe even to this day, there's just someone who's like, won't give it up. They're like, no, I'm so close. I just.
[00:05:06] Speaker B: I'm so close. Okay, okay, I get it. I get it. The chicken soup one did not work. People don't like the broth. But what about this? What about green onion gusher with sour cream filling? Okay, first of all, I like where your head's at.
[00:05:20] Speaker A: Yeah. Okay. Better. I just. It's not always about. I don't think it's the flavor combinations that were. That aren't working. I think it's that everyone hates them the second they put them in their mouth. And it feels like sin that you can never get off your, like, off your tongue. Like, you will never forget what you've done here.
[00:05:39] Speaker B: Exactly. How's it taste? Oh, it tastes great. Why are you making that face? I hate every second of this.
[00:05:44] Speaker A: This is terrible. Why did we do. There's just some things we didn't have to do. We didn't have to create the atomic bomb, and we didn't have to make this. Okay, I'm sorry. There's just some points where man has to step. Step aside and recognize, like, we're only gonna cause our own destruction.
[00:06:00] Speaker B: There is a timeline where savory gushers are just so hip and so hot and people hate sweet. I'd show up, like, what about this fruit one? And they're like, fuck are you talking about? I do not.
[00:06:12] Speaker A: Why would you ever want it to be? No, they're savory.
[00:06:15] Speaker B: I have. I have a pimento loaf gusher, and you want me to eat strawberry? No, thank you. You sick fuck.
[00:06:22] Speaker A: This is my. This is my mashed potato with. With turkey gravy gusher. I wouldn't give this up for the world.
[00:06:29] Speaker B: Oh, my God. Here. Okay. If you could do the. If you could do savory food like that candy that was. I want it.
[00:06:37] Speaker A: Stop it.
[00:06:37] Speaker B: No, it's. I'm saying, like, I want that flavor, but it can't be that mechanism. It can't be that mechanism through that.
[00:06:44] Speaker A: And that's essentially what they're doing when they put the runny egg on the burger is now they've created a situation where now I've just got something that never gushes, really? I mean, I know you could be like, oh, if it has all these. If it's got sauces. Da da da. You know what I mean? Nothing's going to leak out from my first bite and then be dribbling all over me. All over the plate. And if you say, oh, well, then you get. Then dip your burger in that and make a salt. Burgers are meant to be dipped. They're not french dips. They're not. It's not. That's not what the sandwich is for. It should be singularly in the burger. That's all it should be. Okay. That's. That's how you enjoy a burger. It should not be a dipped thing. Then now you've put all that sauce on the outside.
[00:07:24] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:07:24] Speaker A: And you're not letting all the other flavors that have been. Someone worked really hard to layer. That's the thing. It's a layered thing. It's not supposed to go in anyway.
[00:07:32] Speaker B: You know what can. You know what can handle it? A burrito. A breakfast burrito.
[00:07:37] Speaker A: I don't. Would you. That would be the most gushery one. If you put in.
[00:07:41] Speaker B: I've had a breakfast burrito that, like, has kind of a gucci egg in there. But, like, the way it worked, like, when you took a bite. Yeah. Gushed out, but if you. When you took it away and held it back, the old kind of leaked back into the burrito.
[00:07:54] Speaker A: Sure. I feel like what you're describing is, like the burrito equivalent of glow sticks. Like, you get your burrito and they're like, hey, you got to crack it first, shake it up and get that juice in there and then eat it. That's going to be the way you're going to want to take down this specific breakfast burrito.
[00:08:11] Speaker B: Exactly. They didn't say that, but that's basically what I ended up doing. Yeah. I'm glad you're such a quick learner when it comes to burrito science.
[00:08:18] Speaker A: Yes. Yes. Yes. I mean, I've done. I wouldn't say I have a degree in it, but I would say I'm, like that annoying friend who's done a lot of their own research and all of a sudden is like, you know, is like, oh, well, did you know that rna mRNA vaccines actually work like this? You're like, dog, just a year ago, you didn't know how to, like, how to. How to hook up your car battery, but now you're an mRNA expert. Yeah. No, no, no. You. You big guy. But in the positive way, with burritos. And I don't. And usually, I think most people are willing to accept my credentials and my knowledge.
[00:08:55] Speaker B: Yeah. I'm actually in the process of filling out a honorary certificate for you from Devry University for burritoscience.
[00:09:02] Speaker A: Oh, my God. I mean, that would be an honor. Like, I mean, you can't do it yourself, so I'm glad. I appreciate that you're doing that for me. Um, and if it. I mean, we'll keep you guys posted if. If I do get my honorary degree in burritos sciences, um, because I'm probably. Because then I would, you know, certainly chipotle, I'd be calling you up.
[00:09:20] Speaker B: He would quit this show in a heartbeat and become a burrito guy.
[00:09:23] Speaker A: Yeah, just become the burrito dude. Yeah, I mean, it's the truth. It's all I ever. It's all I would ever want to do. I see, like, when some. There's a guy on. He's, like, on the complex channel on Instagram, but he. His whole show is about tacos. And I'm like, dog, way to go. There's another dude who just does burgers, makes, like, classic burgers, and it's just like, every day. You can't have a bad day, right? Like, I have to imagine even those days where you're just, like, your. Everything around your life has been bad, but then you, like, you're. You're going into work, and you're just so upset, right? Ir's wants to do an audit of your taxes. Your wife's talking about divorce. Your kids suck. But then you go and you're, like, making burgers today. Dude.
[00:10:04] Speaker B: What? Why are you banging all those pans over there? Throwing a temper tantrum. They got to make delicious tacos.
[00:10:09] Speaker A: Okay, wait a second. Never mind. I'm happy again. I just have to say it out loud sometimes. I just got to hear myself say it. So let's talk about this first matchup cereal burrito, because I do think there is a clear winner. I think that cereal is here. This is, I think, a historic champion. I think this is like your Boston Celtics. I mean, granted, they did just win the championship, so not the best example, but I. I think like, it deserves to be talked about because at the end of the day, is there no when you need just something and you're just like, I gotta eat something quick cereals gotta be what? Top three options. Protein bar cereal and maybe some type of item that you're gonna put peanut butter on.
[00:10:52] Speaker B: Absolutely.
[00:10:53] Speaker A: Like, that's the team. That's the quick lunch, quick dinner team right there.
[00:10:58] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:10:59] Speaker A: All depends on your vibe.
[00:11:00] Speaker B: Here's the thing. This is. Might be a deep cut. Nick. Tell me if you get the joke. If I went back in time with a breakfast burrito and handed it to John Harvey Kellogg, he would have started masturbating immediately. He would have given up his whole way of life and said, fuck cornflakes. I'm a burrito boy now.
[00:11:15] Speaker A: Yeah, I. And, or here's the thing. If any of you don't know this about Mister Kellogg, because some of you might not, and we're not going to get too deep into this, you can go listen to a lot of other people talk about this, but the whole reason cornflakes existed, this is not a lie. This isn't a bit. Bits have left the room. This is two men talking to you. Honestly, the whole reason he invented it was two. And shredded wheat is the same reason, just from another Quaker. These men were like, all these boys are jerking it way too much. We gotta. And it's gotta be the spicy food. It's gotta be the spicy food that they're eating. You have to remember this is a time in american history where the spiciest food is because of maybe pepper. We. And like, someone may be using one jalapeno a year. You know, like. And they were like, this shit is way too spicy for these kids. They are jerking off way too much over the spicy food.
[00:12:09] Speaker B: So here's, let's put it this way, Nick. Can something win that is literally made to be so flavorless that it would make you not want to jerk your. If something tastes so bad that it makes me never want to beat off again? What?
[00:12:24] Speaker A: It's a backwards metric. It's a backward system. If I didn't have something good, guess what I want to have next? Something good. Do you know what feels good? Yeah.
[00:12:36] Speaker B: Like, I feel like you should have had to backfire. John Kelly's like, here, try the cereal. And everyone's like, this sucks. I'm gonna go jerk off. He's like, yeah, no. And then I. I put him out of the time machine. Hand him a burrito. I'm like, you should have gave him this. Boy, you're never gonna want to touch your meat again.
[00:12:52] Speaker A: These are gonna enjoy this so much that they'll never. They'll never want to do it. Do that. Do that. Dirty, dirty sin. What do you think? When they went to product test this, right? And they're launching it, they got their group, their focus group, and they're going through, and they're like, okay, so you all tried cornflakes. What did you think? I thought it was okay.
It's definitely. I like the cool. The crunchiness of the cereal and that it's got the cold milk. I really like that. Fantastic. Fantastic. Did at any point it make you want to masturbate?
[00:13:26] Speaker B: No, I'm sorry, what? One guy in the back who looks fucking wild is like, yeah, it did.
We know it did for you, you sick fuck. Yeah, I just. It's gotta be burrito. This is not even. I mean, serial. Thanks for coming here. But once you upgrade to bur. No one's. The only reason I don't have a breakfast burrito every morning for breakfast is cause I would have to make one.
[00:13:46] Speaker A: Right, right. And also. And I know some of you are going to say, well, they have them in the frozen freezer section. That that's like a stopgap. And you can. But it's never. It's never right. It's never that. You get the hot pocket fiasco. That happens. Right? It doesn't get cold. It gets. It's either too hot or too cold all at the same time. Yeah. It's just not right. You got to have your breakfast burrito. You got to prepare it. Someone's got a hand roll that. It can't just be made in a factory. But, yeah, cereal. Thank you. But that's one of those things, too, where if someone, like, told you that all they ate was cereal, you'd be like, you got to grow up, my guy.
[00:14:21] Speaker B: Yeah, man. You can't. We can't live like this. You need to. First of all, we need. You need to touch yourself right now, and then we're taking you to breakfast burritos. So let's go.
[00:14:28] Speaker A: I don't want to be clear. I think we did move. I don't think all serials to this day, I don't think they've been keeping up that mission of John Kellogg to keep you, like, all right, we got to make another one. That's good. We haven't figured it out yet. There's got to be a cereal that's going to stop these kids from jerking off. We've tried everything, though. We put Reese's in them. We put cinnamon toast crunch.
[00:14:49] Speaker B: That's going to be. I think you're right, because that's the only reason that sour patch kids cereal happened. They're like, fuck it. This is our last chance.
[00:14:57] Speaker A: We're not going to get it. We got to get this.
[00:15:00] Speaker B: These kids are going to rip the.
[00:15:01] Speaker A: One dude just like ill to this day holds. It's like John Kellogg's son. And he's just like, no. My dad started this company with a mission to stop young boys from jerking off.
[00:15:12] Speaker B: It's all he ever talked about, which we found interesting.
[00:15:16] Speaker A: It made. It made holidays awful. I'll be honest.
[00:15:20] Speaker B: If I save one kid from ripping his own weiner off, that I've done my father proud, and all the CEO's like, I don't just kids.
[00:15:29] Speaker A: Is that. Wait, is that what it was? He ripped his dick off. That's why he doesn't kill a rip.
[00:15:34] Speaker B: Off his own dick.
[00:15:35] Speaker A: He just did it bad. And now we all have to suffer and have shredded wheats. I didn't think. Doesn't make any sense. Why did anyone?
[00:15:42] Speaker B: All right. But, yeah.
[00:15:43] Speaker A: Although I guess it's better if the alternative was he then was like, really? He's like, I made a mistake. I ripped my own dick off. Now, on every cereal box is a diagram for how to properly masturbate.
[00:15:54] Speaker B: You just better eat. It's like when we were in middle school and there was no. I didn't have a cell phone, so I'd read the cereal box and instead of doing the maze on the back or the. The fill in the word jumble, it's just like how to properly. How to properly stroke your hog. Why does it say that?
[00:16:08] Speaker A: Put these in order. What step goes first? Oh, yeah, I. I'm gonna. Let's move. We gotta move. Breakfast burrito on where it will go up against. We got a very parisian side of this bracket. Assuming that these are where they're made. I don't know. Omelette is a french word and french toast, self explanatory.
[00:16:28] Speaker B: It's got French in it.
[00:16:29] Speaker A: It's got French in it.
[00:16:30] Speaker B: So we have a new breakfast spot in town that I've discovered. Nick. We went there to do our research and I got a fried rice omelet.
My brother in Christ, it was so.
[00:16:42] Speaker A: Eggs and rice is so good. Like, that's one of those things where. Way to go. Way to go. The rest of the world, literally the majority of the world knew this and has been going hard on eggs and rice for so long, and we've just been stuck here being like, I don't know, I guess you could put on toast.
[00:16:59] Speaker B: We gotta go there also, Nick. Cause I know this. This isn't even part of the bracket, but it'll strike your fancy. Best breakfast sausage I've ever had. Nothing is close.
[00:17:08] Speaker A: Nothing is close. Or are we doing link? Are we doing patterns?
[00:17:11] Speaker B: Link, bro.
[00:17:13] Speaker A: Oh, I love a good.
[00:17:15] Speaker B: So much better than any sausage I've ever had that I can't even think of a list.
[00:17:21] Speaker A: Nap on that casing. What was that snap.
[00:17:24] Speaker B: Like, it was perfect. It, like, it was like a crunch snap. Oh, my God.
[00:17:27] Speaker A: Oh, I want it. I'll be there. I'll be there. You know I will be.
[00:17:30] Speaker B: Yeah. And I'm taking you there.
[00:17:31] Speaker A: I want it bad.
[00:17:34] Speaker B: You'll get it.
[00:17:35] Speaker A: So here's. So here's where I feel like I'm at here. I I do. I like an omelet. I think an omelet's really strong. Once again, for the, for the kitchen sink factor, right. The fact is, you can look in your fridge, take all the ingredients you want, toss them in. But there's something about. I like that we took, we looked at breakfast as the first meal of the day, and we were like, you know what? You're the only one that can be sweet. It's just you. All the other dinner, lunch, savory all the way. Nothing really sweet besides maybe fruit. But we looked at breakfast and we were just like, no, you can eat candy for this. It's fine. Like, don't worry about it. More sugar than you should be allowed to have at any one time. So french toast is literally because it's the, it's how they use day old bread. They were trying to, like, figure out.
[00:18:25] Speaker B: Which is the best, by the way.
[00:18:27] Speaker A: Yeah. If you're not stale, like, if you know you're going to have french toast, if you know the next day, make. Leave that. Cut that bread up and leave it out for the day, for that, and that, for that night, let it get nice and dried up, because then when you put in your egg mixed, it's just gonna soak that bad boy up. Get you that really nice custardy french toast. If you feel like your french toast is not custardy in the middle, it's because you're using fresh bread and you gotta stale it out, right? And so, to your point, yes, to some degree. They're, like, looking around at all this excess bread. Like, we gotta figure out some way. But no one's gonna. No one wants to eat nasty, dry bread. Well, hold on. I got an idea for you here. And. And boom, voila. French toast. It was the only way.
[00:19:09] Speaker B: So I feel like you're leaning towards french toast, which is fine. I want to put this thought in the air when I. Okay. No matter what, if I eat an omelet, I always feel good after I'm done. Like, I ate breakfast. That was a good breakfast. Anyone said, what'd you have for breakfast? I'd be like, oh, it was an omelet. If I show up and someone's like, oh, yeah, I went for a run, and I had a nice kale smoothie. What'd you do this morning? And I'm like, I had french toast. Like, it just. It doesn't hang with the. I don't know. Is that anything?
[00:19:34] Speaker A: No, you're right. No, no, it does. No, there is something to be said about the moral superiority of omelettes. Much like the French, right? This is where. This is the more French of the two. Cause this has a higher moral superiority.
[00:19:47] Speaker B: Which is kind of where I'm getting at. I want to feel better than.
[00:19:50] Speaker A: Well, dog, let's not. I mean, let's not forget that. I mean, if we're talking about omelets, we get them all. We get egg white omelets. And if there is nothing more up its own ass than an egg white omelet with spinach and tomato and just the littlest bit of low moisture mozzarella.
[00:20:11] Speaker B: I put a little. I put a little gruyere in it for you.
[00:20:14] Speaker A: Just a little, though. Just a little.
There's nothing more rubbery and gross. I wouldn't feed it to my dog. Then an egg white. I hate these. And I'm not blaming omelets for this, by the way. Omelets. This is not against omelets. They didn't choose this life. Omelets came to us and said, you got to use the whole egg.
[00:20:32] Speaker B: Here's the problem, though. No, no, no. I get what you're saying, but this is against omelets. Once you start playing in this realm, you gotta. Once you make it to the final four, we bring all your homies in. Dog, we're looking up who you dated in middle school. Yeah, we're gonna find them. I want to dig in. I want to know your whole life. Oh, hey, omelette. Why do you have a c here on your third grade report card? Explain yourself. I'm looking over a french toast, Nick. Fresh toast is looking sweet and tight, and it does not have, you know.
[00:20:57] Speaker A: What french toast did with time over time. It was just like, hey, I don't know if this is anything, so you guys take it or leave it. Why don't you stuff me full of cream cheese?
And we were all like, what? The french toast? Are you sure? Are you sure about this?
[00:21:15] Speaker B: It's like, hey, not. I'm not. Hey, maybe. Okay. Okay. Sorry. I didn't mean, like, I guess you could stuff me with any sort of jam you want, or any sort of.
[00:21:21] Speaker A: I guess maybe even fresh fruit, if that's where you're leaning. I guess it could really be. I mean, anything sweet would probably do really good inside of me, and we're all just like, bro, what? No, seriously, though. And I just feel like, so here's my. Here's my thing with omelets that, for me, kind of solidified. I am going to go french toast. I'm going french toast.
Here's what happened for me. So I had some leftover green, chopped green pepper and onion. I'm looking at it, and I know, and I'm like, okay, you know what I got? I could make it. I could whip up this omelet super quick. This is the perfect. They're diced, right? I'm just kind of saute them a little bit. Boom. Omelette. I made a breakfast burrito instead. Like, I looked at, and I had the. And it would have been so much easier to make the omelet because I had to do all the other steps for the breakfast burrito. But at the end of the day, I like an omelet. I especially like an omelet at a station. I'm always a fan of that. I'll always do it. Shout out to all omelet chefs. Uh, at every golden corral, you are doing the Lord's work. But I got it. For me, it's french toast. I just. If I couldn't in my own home with the perfect ingredients to do it, if my heart wasn't there, I just got to be honest. I can't go that way. So I got to go french toast.
[00:22:34] Speaker B: The omelet, I like, I feel like, especially the omelet's always there for me. It's great. Sometimes I don't want french toast. Sometimes I don't want a sweet breakfast. But also, if I'm trying to close a big business deal over breakfast, I gotta have an omelet.
[00:22:47] Speaker A: It's a power. It's a power. For sure. You're letting them know. Like, look how good I take care of myself. Like, I'm probably the healthiest person, you know. I'm having an omelet.
[00:22:56] Speaker B: And your business is in good hands with me because I won't be dead.
[00:22:59] Speaker A: It's got all that protein you got.
[00:23:00] Speaker B: You got nick over there eating a fucking big old plate of french toast. Like, you can give that guy your business. He's not going to live to lunch.
[00:23:08] Speaker A: I didn't. And to be. And I don't disagree with you on that, by the way. You are right in. In that space. I just. I think maybe my problem is, is that I just. Maybe I'm not closing up big business deals over over breakfast. I usually close mine over lunch.
[00:23:22] Speaker B: Dude, best time to close him is breakfast, everyone. Cause then if you close a big business deal, you could do a big business closing. You're done for the day.
[00:23:29] Speaker A: Well, it's kind of like having sex in the morning, right? Or working out in the morning. You've done something now that the rest of your day, you just look at everyone else and you're like, I'm better than you. Yeah. Today I got laid, and it's not even 10:00 a.m. okay, I'm better than you.
[00:23:44] Speaker B: Hey, I.
[00:23:44] Speaker A: Wait.
[00:23:44] Speaker B: I just.
[00:23:45] Speaker A: I just crushed a five k. But while you are sleeping. Okay, I'm better than you. Like, it's just true.
[00:23:53] Speaker B: I ate an egg white omelet with a little bit of onions, little bit of spinach and some gruyere. And I closed a big business deal. A big business boy. And you're sleeping like a bitch.
[00:24:03] Speaker A: Yeah. The whole time. But you know. And so I do. I hear what you're saying. I just. At the. I was there. I was in my home, Cody. I had the eggs to do it. I didn't do it. So I gotta. I. And I know, given the opportunity I love. I'm gonna get that french toast. I know that. That's if I'm on. If I'm looking at a menu and if I'm feeling sweet, we're getting french toast. So we'll settle this the only way we know how. With the american voting coin of 2004, as brought to you by random.org, we got John Kerry facing up, which means George Bush is on the other side.
Low seed gets to pick, and that's going to be Cody. Where are you going with this, big guy?
[00:24:44] Speaker B: Okay, I'm going on what's I gotta go. John Kerry, you know, he gets the boy. This is omelet boy. Yeah. Yeah. Fucking Bush couldn't even. I was like, hey, push you on an omelet. He couldn't hear me cuz his ears are full of syrup because he's been just raw dog in a plate full of french toast.
[00:25:01] Speaker A: Yeah, he is headfirst. He's got like, he's got a whole. He's got a whole like loaf of bread just. He made it all his french toast.
[00:25:09] Speaker B: Why is former President Bush wearing water wings? Oh, it's french toast day. He's gonna get.
[00:25:14] Speaker A: He gets in there, dude, it gets pretty deep. He's gotta. He's gotta prep himself. All right, well, we'll flip. It's George Bush.
[00:25:22] Speaker B: Bush, dude. Maybe he's healthier than we thought.
[00:25:24] Speaker A: It is. All right, so we have breakfast burritos.
[00:25:27] Speaker B: Oh, my God. Do you think this is an omen? Is Bush's cholesterol, like, fucked or something?
[00:25:31] Speaker A: I mean, I don't.
[00:25:33] Speaker B: There's got to be something. There's no reason. Acne. I know we don't get into this. We've never done this before, but there's absolutely no reason that the fates would flip the coin bush, in this scenario, unless he needed our help. Some.
[00:25:45] Speaker A: We got to reach out. You got to slow down. It's too much french toast. It's too much for. I would say, if there was any time to go back in George Bush's life and correct him, it was probably college. And it's probably more about cocaine than it is french toast. I think. I mean, you don't think every politician has killed a guy? Like, I can't. You can't stop that happening.
[00:26:08] Speaker B: Once you win your election to get into the Senate, they bring you into a dark room. It's during the ritual. They're giving everyone the tours. We get to see all this stuff. They do the tours. What they don't show you is that they go in the back room and you do have to, first of all, strangle a puppy. I think that's fucked. But all of your elected officials do it. And then they have to kill a.
[00:26:24] Speaker A: Guy right then and there.
[00:26:25] Speaker B: It's.
[00:26:25] Speaker A: It's basically, if you've seen the Kingsman, it's that. That's where they got the idea from, is that. And that's. And that. That stems from England, too.
[00:26:34] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:26:34] Speaker A: This is from the Magna.
[00:26:36] Speaker B: This is the Magna Carta. This is the Magna Carta.
[00:26:38] Speaker A: It's right there.
[00:26:39] Speaker B: It's in there.
[00:26:40] Speaker A: So unfortunately, it sucks. Like, it's. You would thought of when we decided to get our freedom from the British, that that was like, we would have left all of that behind. Turns out founding fathers maybe a little sicker than we thought.
[00:26:52] Speaker B: They added the puppy thing, right?
[00:26:54] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:26:55] Speaker B: That was in addition from the founding fathers, which I find. Fuck.
[00:26:58] Speaker A: I mean, to some degree, there's a part of me that wants to say that, like, it just shows how much harder we are as Americans, that we're like, not only could I kill another man, cold blooded, no remorse, don't even know who this person is. Walk in, bang, done. I can do that to a puppy as well with my bare hands. And I think it just shows England that we're like, we're that dude. We are him in the worst way. The worst way.
All right, so here we are in the final, final matchup here. We got burrito, french toast, and, Cody, I love talking to you, and I could talk to you for hours and hours and hours about anything. I could talk to you hours and hours about this we have, but you're not going to. Nothing's going to change.
Nothing can change me off of. Breakfast burrito is the best delivery system. The only negative I can give you is that maybe it's too much starch. Right. If you're putting in a potato or too many carbs, you're putting in a potato, you're using, you know, a tortilla is 300 calories right there. But at the end of the day, just pivot and say, breakfast burrito for breakfast. It's also kind of my lunch. Yeah, you don't need to go. You don't need more food.
[00:28:14] Speaker B: If you eat a breakfast burrito at 1130 in the afternoon, you did it. You can ride that wave until 07:00 p.m. have a light salad, and you're good to go.
[00:28:22] Speaker A: Yeah, exactly. It doesn't. So there. Don't worry about the calories. French toast. Like you said, french toast is a valiant competitor. It is. Like I said, it's a favorite for sure. It's the best sweet breakfast I think there is.
[00:28:36] Speaker B: I think, without a doubt, we can say that. Yeah.
[00:28:38] Speaker A: Yeah. But at the end of the day, I am more of a savory guy when it comes to breakfast, and I love the portability breakfast. I mean, at the end, breakfast is, for some people, it's a very on the go situation.
[00:28:49] Speaker B: Not much. I mean, besides the french toast stick, unless I can get a french toast breakfast burrito. Where's science ended on this? Have they landed anywhere? Yet.
[00:28:57] Speaker A: I mean, well, you take a burrito. I probably. Yeah, you cut up your french toast. I put an egg, some bacon or sausage, some, uh, may, some not mayo, maple syrup on top as I'm going bite for bite. Maybe I already put it in there. Or maybe I put in.
[00:29:11] Speaker B: It doesn't matter because I'm. I'm a breakfast burrito as well. I mean, this is a no brainer, I think. French toast. Although the french toast I had for research. Nick, croissant.
[00:29:19] Speaker A: No?
[00:29:20] Speaker B: Yeah, bro, but it's.
[00:29:21] Speaker A: It's. I want that. Do not get me wrong.
[00:29:24] Speaker B: It was good.
[00:29:24] Speaker A: That is, at the end of the day, you. We've said this before. We're not splitting the atom on this. French toast will put you down. That's what it's there for, by the way. That. And that's how you should treat it. You shouldn't treat french toast as this, like, oh, I'm gonna have french toast, and then I'm gonna have the rest of my day. No, you're hungover. You just need, you need carbs, you need nutrients. You need. You need that little bit of. You need some sugar to just make.
[00:29:50] Speaker B: You feel something again for once in your miserable life.
[00:29:53] Speaker A: But then it's gonna put you down, and it's gonna then heal you from the inside while you're passed out. But everyone is making that mistake of thinking french toast is some kind of light breakfast item or just something that you can just like, oh, I'm going to have a normal day after this. No, you're not.
[00:30:08] Speaker B: Stop it.
[00:30:09] Speaker A: Breakfast burrito. No matter what says to you, hey, I'm portable. I will go with you on this journey. I'm here for you as. As much as you want. And I think it. And I think it meets that mission.
[00:30:20] Speaker B: I think so, too. I think it depends where you go. I've been to places where the breakspear will also put you down. But I totally.
[00:30:24] Speaker A: I mean, they're big, but that's also, you know, what you can do at some point, which you can do with french toast. Just put. Take your. Take your tinfoil, roll it back over the top, come back later. It's still going to be pretty solid.
[00:30:35] Speaker B: I'm not getting breed. I think you're absolutely right. I think we did this one. I think we did this right.
[00:30:39] Speaker A: Yeah, this is. I will. I don't know if I've ever been more confident about a bracket. I think from top to bottom, snout to tail. Now, is that because every time we flipped, I got it my way? Maybe I don't know.
It might be that some people will say it was that, but I don't know. And the. And there's no way to know. There's no way to know.
[00:30:58] Speaker B: To tell.
[00:30:58] Speaker A: Yeah, but I. I feel like every decision, as I look through this, every decision, I'm like, yeah, that's why.
[00:31:05] Speaker B: That's why this one was also super affected by the bracket seating. Man, this could have went a lot of different ways.
[00:31:10] Speaker A: Could have. It definitely could have. But I do. I just feel so solid about where we landed. I don't. I don't even. I don't think this could be controversial. I know a lot of times people are like, I. I'm sorry. I just couldn't go with you. I think this is one where everyone's going to, throughout the thing, be like.
[00:31:25] Speaker B: Well, you did in group C. You did go off on that. That diatribe, remember, about them and those people.
[00:31:32] Speaker A: And I don't take it back. And I know some of you are hoping. I know some of you are coming, and this may be the last episode that you listen to, because you were like, you know what? I'm going to give him a chance. Nick usually is someone who's willing to admit when he just needed to take a moment to learn and grow, and he'll apologize for sure. No, not this time. I'm not backing down for.
[00:31:51] Speaker B: We nailed it. This is right. Becky is the champion.
[00:31:54] Speaker A: Yeah. So I can't. I can't apologize because I got to this point. Okay. I'm sorry.
Hey, guess what? You got to break a few eggs to make an omelet. Go fuck yourself.
Got him.
All right. Breakfast burrito is our champion. Thank you all so much for listening to this episode of friendly competition. If you want to help out your boys, a few things that you can do, as always, share with a friend, tell a friend, wherever you're listening to this, make sure you hit that. Like that. Follow that. Subscribe and give us those five stars, please.
[00:32:26] Speaker B: Absolutely. Follow us on all our social media, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook. Just got friendly compod. If you have an idea for a cereal that when you eat it, it'll make you not want to masturbate, email those to us at friendly
[email protected].
[00:32:37] Speaker A: Dot shout out to Charizard for that intro to our music. You want to hear more of their stuff? And over to Bandcamp, type in Charizard. Replace the vowels with sixes. That is going to be it for us, folks. We got a new season coming up on Monday, but until then, I've been Nick Carey.
[00:32:53] Speaker B: And I'm Cody Linux.
